Well, I have gone from my blog for so long I had a hard time
finding it. Things have changed here in Blog world. I hope I
can learn the changes and get back into posting once again.
I still struggle with my Mom pasting. Things have been bad
lately. Brent my younger brother and his family are moving in
with my Dad. Which is a good thing. But, it has been hard on
me going through all my Mom's stuff...as in her collection of
dolls, stuffed bears and other items. I feel sad...like we are
erasing her from our home and lives. I know things do not matter.
I know she is thinking...my goodness why did I spend so much money on that stuff. Now look at the mess Kimmie has to clean up.
And get rid of it all. Not all of it Mom...just most of it. You
knew I didn't have any room at my place for it. I do love you Mom
for leaving all your treasures to me. It is just a hard step to take.
My Dad is doing ok. He keeps asking me when is my Mother going
to come get him. Did she forget me? He is going to be 89 on
Sept 24. He is in pain, tired and bored in life. He is at home
all the time. He has a hard time getting out of the house. He love his mini lap top. He enjoys looking up people and music on
google and music on youtube. He has always had a great love for
music.
A friend told me...she has losted both her parents years ago. It never get easier...you just get use to them not being around as
much.She is right. Who ever wrote TIME HEALS ALL PAIN, was not in touch with real feelings. The pain is always there. You do find a different kind of
joy now in life. Happiness feels different..love is different.
Everyday is different. You learn to feel and live in a different world because they are now gone. It is true..a part is missing from your heart and it does feel empty.
But, being sad hurts everyone...you, friend,family your pets and the one love you miss...more then anyone ...Our Father in Heaven.
He wants us to be happy. He wants us to remember his plan for us
to be together again..to be a Family forever.
Life my Mom...I will always be your Mother..and you will always be my daughter..that will never change.
Saturday, June 22, 2013
Monday, October 29, 2012
I must say...time does fly. Life does go on without you. And the world does not stop
when you are drowning.
It has been a very long time since I have been on my own blog. To tell you the truth
I am impressed I could have had one. I have no idea how to post a picture anymore.
I am sure I could learn...and that would be fun to do once again.
So, what have I been doing the last few years.....Much.
I had a great job where I would drive all over and check out different products. Making sure
they had the right price, making sure they were set up correctly and so on. One day on the
way home...I was hit by the Truck behind me at a stop light. The driver told me he was
reaching for his soft drink. He was sorry and did have a good insurance. My car was totaled.
This wonderful car that I am waited so long to have gotten. It has air and a CD player. I believed
I could go anywhere in it with no problems.
This all took place at the first start of people losing their homes, banks close and jobs were
being taken away. We are self employed and when there is no home or jobs..we have no work.
It was a rough time...and my money to replace my car...went to pay our bills. Kinds of a around
the block blessing. We so need money to pay out bills and to stay afloat. I was able to take over my Dad's car...and 1986 Capri. Good shape...runs great and had a good air con.
Looking back...losing my job was all part of the plan that was next to come in my life.
My Mom's health going down hill. She started having these spills..where it seem to
be more like a stroke. All the signs were there. But, she would come out of them by the
time was rushed to the hospital. Little by little she very slowly stop having any interest in anything. She had a hard time talking and didn't really want to eat anymore. As a family
we tried anything. After a few months at home in her hospital bed in the living room she pasted away in her sleep. One thing I have learned...you really can't prepare yourself when your Mother pastes. The pain is so bad you wish you could cut it out of your body because you feel like
it is eating at you. And even though you know she is fine, happy and you will see her once again. It doesn't matter...I wanted her back, here with me in good health.
A year pasted and I was still feeling so hurt and depressed. I was not moving on.
Until one night I had a dream. Now mind you I dream every night, at nap time...always.
I would often see my Mom in my dreams...but, she was always off to the side..doing something or helping one of my daughters in some way. But, this dream was different. It was just her and I.
There was nothing but blackness...but our faces were bright as if a spot light was on them.
My Mom said to me...Kimberlie, You are missing me way too much. And thinking of me too
much as well. You need to stop this. You are putting me before God and Jesus..and that
just can not be. They always come before anyone. She then told me...I will always be your Mom.
You will always be my daughter. That will never change. You will always be special to me.
I told her..ok Mom I get it. I won't think or miss you so much. And so fast...and right to the person she is...she said..a bit upset...Well, I didn't mean that! I said...no Mom I get it.
I will always miss you and think of you. But, not before God or Christ..I get it. You will be always my Mom. I will always be your daughter..nothing has changed and nothing will. We are special to one another. That is where I woke up. She had to tell me...to live on. That I have much work to do for our Father in Heaven and our Savior Jesus Christ. I was losing the honor of serving
our God and Savior. So, I am doing my best to get my placement in the world once again. Not each day is easy or hour..but, When your Mom tells you something..You got to listen. : )
What a blessing this has been for me. Not everyone is blessed with being able to see and
receive a message frp, a loved one. And you know what...we do become younger when
we move on to Heaven. I knew she was my Mom...but, she was much younger now. Now. that is something to look forward too.
when you are drowning.
It has been a very long time since I have been on my own blog. To tell you the truth
I am impressed I could have had one. I have no idea how to post a picture anymore.
I am sure I could learn...and that would be fun to do once again.
So, what have I been doing the last few years.....Much.
I had a great job where I would drive all over and check out different products. Making sure
they had the right price, making sure they were set up correctly and so on. One day on the
way home...I was hit by the Truck behind me at a stop light. The driver told me he was
reaching for his soft drink. He was sorry and did have a good insurance. My car was totaled.
This wonderful car that I am waited so long to have gotten. It has air and a CD player. I believed
I could go anywhere in it with no problems.
This all took place at the first start of people losing their homes, banks close and jobs were
being taken away. We are self employed and when there is no home or jobs..we have no work.
It was a rough time...and my money to replace my car...went to pay our bills. Kinds of a around
the block blessing. We so need money to pay out bills and to stay afloat. I was able to take over my Dad's car...and 1986 Capri. Good shape...runs great and had a good air con.
Looking back...losing my job was all part of the plan that was next to come in my life.
My Mom's health going down hill. She started having these spills..where it seem to
be more like a stroke. All the signs were there. But, she would come out of them by the
time was rushed to the hospital. Little by little she very slowly stop having any interest in anything. She had a hard time talking and didn't really want to eat anymore. As a family
we tried anything. After a few months at home in her hospital bed in the living room she pasted away in her sleep. One thing I have learned...you really can't prepare yourself when your Mother pastes. The pain is so bad you wish you could cut it out of your body because you feel like
it is eating at you. And even though you know she is fine, happy and you will see her once again. It doesn't matter...I wanted her back, here with me in good health.
A year pasted and I was still feeling so hurt and depressed. I was not moving on.
Until one night I had a dream. Now mind you I dream every night, at nap time...always.
I would often see my Mom in my dreams...but, she was always off to the side..doing something or helping one of my daughters in some way. But, this dream was different. It was just her and I.
There was nothing but blackness...but our faces were bright as if a spot light was on them.
My Mom said to me...Kimberlie, You are missing me way too much. And thinking of me too
much as well. You need to stop this. You are putting me before God and Jesus..and that
just can not be. They always come before anyone. She then told me...I will always be your Mom.
You will always be my daughter. That will never change. You will always be special to me.
I told her..ok Mom I get it. I won't think or miss you so much. And so fast...and right to the person she is...she said..a bit upset...Well, I didn't mean that! I said...no Mom I get it.
I will always miss you and think of you. But, not before God or Christ..I get it. You will be always my Mom. I will always be your daughter..nothing has changed and nothing will. We are special to one another. That is where I woke up. She had to tell me...to live on. That I have much work to do for our Father in Heaven and our Savior Jesus Christ. I was losing the honor of serving
our God and Savior. So, I am doing my best to get my placement in the world once again. Not each day is easy or hour..but, When your Mom tells you something..You got to listen. : )
What a blessing this has been for me. Not everyone is blessed with being able to see and
receive a message frp, a loved one. And you know what...we do become younger when
we move on to Heaven. I knew she was my Mom...but, she was much younger now. Now. that is something to look forward too.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Last but not least.....
I found this picture of a baby Fairy...isn't she just the cutest thing.. ? YES she is. : )
And one more Kitty cat card.
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